What were the words you chose? Most importantly, how did you choose to say them? Why did they come to mind? Did you pause to consider how your turn of phrase would be received?

Yes, the words matter. Yet how they are delivered counts for even more in the recipient’s ears and in their mind. They may not remember what you said, but they surely will remember how you made them feel.

It’s so easy, so fast, so targeted, so misunderstood. That quick-fire text message may have just backfired on your screen and blown up in your hand. Your last email may lie smoldering in someone’s InBox. Once launched, neither of them are within your control to retrieve to the relative safety of your private thoughts. A subtle turn of phrase could have turned this into a different outcome. Is there an “unsend” button?

A considerate turn of phrase can reveal Reflection, Respect and Restraint. There’s always time for something more, but never a chance to retreat to something less. Those “3 R’s” can avert massive pain. So why not measure your response?

A softer turn of phrase can find a way into conversation, explore motivations and reveal intent. Simple words, added to a direct question or comment, can change the feeling completely. “To help me understand what you’re thinking…”, “Please tell me more about how you reached this conclusion.”, and “How can we move forward from here?” are but 3 simple ways to reframe an otherwise difficult conversation. It doesn’t have to be confrontational, especially when you reveal a genuine desire to listen.

Your turn of phrase can turn a situation from hard to soft, from ugly to viewable, from opposed to aligned. Your words can change the outcome. Make them matter.

​Tempus Maximize!

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